Breaking News - I want to die!!!!!!

I've lost count of how many days Ive been awake, I've lost track of what day of the week it is and what date it is. Insomnia haunts me and I hate it. Not only that I don't seem to able to switch back to Ana. ARGH!!!!!

Thin Thoughts

XOXO

Im too fat... time for thinspiration

Some thinspiration featuring the beautiful Cheryl Cole...

It should be a crime to look that perfect, not just thin but stunningly beautiful too!!!!

Thin Dreams :-)

XOXO

Today has been tough

Well today has been a tough one. Ive not been battling with the voices in my head but battling with the opinions and forcefulness of other people. I understand that it's only because they care but it would be so much easier if they just left me to it!!

I feel sooooo bloated and horrible!!!! I will be thin, I will be perfect!!

Think Thin Thoughts

XOXO

I DESPISE INSOMNIA

Just a quick post as I can't sleep. Its 1am and I havent slept for 4 days and I still can't seem to fall asleep! It is so frustrating!!!!! Ive gone longer than 4 days before but each time this cycle of chronic insomnia hits me, Im unable to cope with it more and more. It is emotionally exhausting. Ive tried so many different kinds of sleep medication from my doctor but nothing seems to work. In large doses they knock me out but an hour later Im up and my brain is turning over and over once again!! I wish we had on off switch. It would make things so much easier.

Im sat on my bed and I can almost hear my stomach grumble above the sound of my tv. I feel a little sick with hunger right now which is unusual for me. I usually feel empty and my stomach grumbles but I rarely feel sick with it. I'll blame tiredness this time round! lol. At least I can sit in the comfort that I am empty and today has been productive :-). I have to be up in 5 hours time so I better try and shut my eyes, not that I'll actually fall asleep :-(.

Keep thinking thin thoughts.

XOXO

what i want to be.....

A reminder of what I want to achieve. An image of perfection and a true inspiration

Stay Strong and THINK THIN!!!!!

XOXO

Weigh In - Quick Update

Well I got up early this morning and set off to my local boots store. I have scales at home but they're so unreliable I don't really like to use them anymore. It was quiet in boots so no-one was around as I made my way to the far corner of the store where the weigh in machine is nicely tucked away. I weighed myself clothed, obviously, I can't very well strip off in the middle of a shop!! haha. Anyhow, I took my jacket off but left my shoes on and almost started to cry when the machine delivered my little printout. I weigh a gut busting 96 pounds!!!!!!! :-(. Not happy at all but I guess it could be worse. I was kind of expecting to have broken through the 7 stone barrier and that would have caused a major depressive episode. I have to really work at this and I must drop some of this weight pretty quickly, I can't deal with weighing that for long. This is only a short entry as I have to go out for a few hours but I will post again later on.

Perfection will one day belong to me and it all starts today!!! The game is on.

XOXO

Some thinspiration to keep Ana alive

I have to keep Ana active in my head and thinspiration certainly helps. Ask me to point out perfection and I will point at the skinniest girl around. I will be that girl one day and will be able to point out perfection in a mirror. All my nightmares are encased within the mirrors reflection, it is nauseating.. but not for long.

   

                                                 

XOXO